Saturday, August 13, 2011

Day 36: Back on Teva Lamotrigine, Thank the Gods

As I related yesterday, my pdoc called in a new lamotrigine scrip, this time at my local Walgreens, which carries the pills manufactured by Teva.  The NorthStar crap I'd been on just wasn't cutting it.  I'm taking 50 mgs for a few days, and then I get to try to cut half of a 100 mg pill in half to get 75 ... my psychiatrist seemed to think this is possible, so I hope he's right.

I'm already feeling better, though my inner monologue points out that it's bright and sunny for the first time in a week.  Confound those confounding factors!  I spent my weekly visit to the local Farmers' Market ruminating on the number of things that can impact my mood disorder.  Things like sunlight, which is beyond my control.  Or the micronutrients in my diet, which are sort of within my control, except that I can't afford to buy a lot of organic produce these days.

I told myself that my rumination was probably not helping me.  Yeah? said my ruminating voice.  Who else is going to take care of these things?  I'm the only one who knows how I'm feeling, who can track that with what I'm eating or how much music I listen to or any of these other factors.  It's not like there's anybody else living in my head!

I realized that this was something to be grateful for.  And thus I was enlightened.

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