Saturday, November 26, 2011

Lamictal 300 mgs: Depression and Some Thanksgiving Gratitude

I complain a lot in this blog.  Its intended purpose was to be a mood diary, and while it is that, it's also become a place for me to vent about my life.  I write here to clarify my thoughts and feelings -- but also to bitch about -- my meds, my mental illness, my learning disabilities, and the impact they have on every single area of my life.

Today I've decided to do something else.  In honor of Thanksgiving weekend, I've decided to list the things I'm grateful for.  I've also decided to make this a weekly feature of my blog.  I whine a lot.  In fairness, the last year of my life has really sucked.  But there are also plenty of good things about my life that I should acknowledge more often. 

Besides, gratitude has been shown to protect against stress and depression, so it will even do me some good.  Ironically, given a post I wrote a few days ago, I'd like to express gratitude for my medications.  For all my issues with Big Pharma, for all my concerns about the long-term side effects they might have, the simple fact is that my meds dramatically improve the quality of my life. 

Because of my meds, my mood is stable enough that I can more or less go about my daily life.  Because of me meds, I can pay attention to one thing long enough to do a ton of things I couldn't do before (write a blog post, for instance).  Because of my meds, I'll be able to create a plan that will enable me to finally find some long-term, fulfilling work.

Without medication, my future would consist of trying to scratch a living from disability checks.  I'd probably be living in my parents' basement.  I suspect I'd be in and out of mental hospitals.  Or I might be homeless.  Worse, I might have given in to suicidal thoughts, and I might be dead.  Whatever effects my meds have on my health in the future, if I weren't on them I'm not sure I'd even have a future. 

This Thanksgiving, I am profoundly grateful for the medications that enable me to live, and allow me to look forward to someday living a normal life.

1 comment:

What are your thoughts? Talk amongst yourselves!